Our Experts

Connecting with the Divine — November 2008

by Arleen Hannich | Email me if you questions or comments | Back to List of Articles

Accepting Your Own Divinity

I begin this month with a quote from Sri Bhagavan, co-founder of the Oneness University. He tells us:

Embracing yourself as you are is the first step and the last step. You must be who you are. What you should be is not important. Whoever you are, you are unique. The Universe has made you like that. God has made you like that.

When we embrace ourselves as we are, we:

• honor that we are a co-creation with the universe
• show our recognition that we are a part of the whole supreme consciousness
• affirm we were created in exactly this way, because we have a specific purpose
  

When you assume that you are the way you are because there is a specific purpose for you, a new meaning arises for your life. If you really believed you are exactly the person you need to be to fulfill your purpose, how would you treat yourself? What would you do differently in your life?

Our limited perspective

We tend to evaluate our own acceptability and worth from a very limited perspective. We are laser-focused on ourselves as individuals. It is important to realize that there is also a broader, higher perspective. Since you are connected with the rest of the universe, it is inaccurate to examine and evaluate yourself in a vacuum. As I once heard Dr. Ron Rosedale say, when cells in our bodies decide to become individuals, we call them cancer. And when cancer kills, the cancer dies as well. The message: there is health and strength in knowing your unity with the rest of the universe.

When you better understand you are part of a greater whole, a larger “system,” you can better appreciate that you have been created in a way to support that system perfectly.

Accepting yourself

Of course, there are some very practical benefits to accepting yourself as you are. When you accept yourself:

• You are able to accept others
• Others accept you
• You do not place yourself in states of resistance and struggling, which are incredible drains on your energy and creativity.
  
  

A first step in accepting yourself is getting to know yourself. You can get to know yourself by experiencing who you are--who you are right now--without becoming obsessed with who you want to become. A great way to do that is to begin actually experiencing your emotions.

Experience your emotions fully

Very few of us are in touch with our emotions, therefore, very few of us are in touch with ourselves. If we are not honoring what is important to us, we are not honoring what is important to the Divine. There is no separation.

The next time you feel an emotion that you find difficult or scary; for example, anger, grief, fear, sadness, rejection, betrayal, pain, guilt, or jealousy, I invite you to go inside and feel the feeling completely.

Many of us do not feel safe feeling our emotions, but in fact we are safe to do so. The experience is rarely as painful as our mind would have us believe, and it is rarely as painful as living with pain that has been buried for years or even decades. Many of us feel it is “inappropriate” or “unacceptable” to feel our emotions; that’s what we’ve been taught and conditioned to believe.

Your mind wants to distract you from your pain

Because of our fears and beliefs, once we make the decision to truly experience how we feel, our mind will want to get very involved. As useful as our minds are in external life, when it comes to difficult feelings, our minds can only help us run away from or “manage” difficult feelings. The mind can only help us feel soothed in the moment; it is not concerned with us honoring our own truth. And it is not concerned with all the future consequences we will experience due to our refusal to feel our emotions.

Your mind will use several techniques to distract you from feelings you do not want to feel. It may have you:

• Place your focus on blaming yourself or others
• Go into analytic overdrive, trying to understand the event/situation/person that “caused you” to feel this emotion
• Talk with someone, eat, drink, watch TV, read a book, etc.
• Attempt to find answers for endless questions
  
  There are actually infinite ways the mind can distract you from your feelings. Be aware of your mind the next time you are feeling hurt, angry, or scared. Your awareness will bring you back to center. Soon, you’ll notice your particular habits and patterns for escaping from difficult feelings.

Back to feeling our emotions

Once you’ve witnessed the mind at work, you can let it be, and bring your focus back to the emotion at hand. Here are some suggestions to help you get started.

• Whenever you begin to feel a difficult emotion, let go of the struggle and resistance, and see how relaxed you can be with it. You may feel physical sensations arise. If so, breathe into them and allow them to unfold. Hold a space for them. If your feelings take you back to a childhood situation, go there and experience it as a child, rather than from your current age. Feel; don’t analyze!
• If you feel like you’re stuck, or you need some help, breathe slowly and deeply. Ask the Divine to help you experience the feeling fully. This prayer is far more effective than requesting the feeling be taken away.
• When the experience is complete, you may feel calm, peaceful, or that a sense of normalcy or neutrality has returned for you. Or, you may feel relief, gratitude, and/or a sense that “something bigger” is present with you. Perhaps you’ll feel a sense of Oneness. Know whatever response arises in you is perfect.

Practice makes perfect

Initially, this process can take some time and effort, but it gets easier with practice. Please note that paying attention to your emotions is not to be confused with participating with them, egging them on, getting totally overcome by them, getting attached to them, or allowing them to run your life!

To raise our consciousness to the highest levels, we must experience the hurt and pain we feel in our lives. If we choose to stay stuck in our anger and pain, by denying or avoiding it, we cannot grow--we can only recycle old hurts! Every time you feel your emotions fully, you begin to live your life more authentically.

This month, whenever you have doubts about yourself or your self worth, remind yourself that Divine Grace is working through you perfectly, that you have a life purpose that is uniquely yours, and that you are perfectly suited to fulfill that purpose. Remember what Sri Bhagavan tells us, “Embracing yourself as you are is the first step and the last step.”

by Arleen Hannich | Email me if you questions or comments | Back to List of Articles